Sweet Melissa

Will Talk For Airtime

Constant Readers,

I got an email today from the folks over at Green 960 AM asking if I would agree to be interviewed for today's Progressive News with John Scott. My first thought was, "Poor guys! They must have had a last-minute cancellation of a real guest." Second thought: "Who cares! I'll talk to anyone who'll listen!" (I get this from my Mom.) So, I phoned in and spoke with John Scott for a few minutes about the recent  SF election, blogging and a post I wrote about the Presidential Election Reform Act. John (we're buddies now - that's him on the left) was great. I have heard his show before, but he was so intelligent and easy to talk to that I came away an even bigger fan than when I started. I'll put up a link to the interview as soon as it is available (likely tomorrow).

--Melissa

UPDATE: Alllllrighty. Click here and move the little thingy an inch from the left (or about 1/3 of the total length) to get to the interview. Its about 3 minutes long. Or listen to the whole hour of talk radio if you like - the rest of the show is quite good.

My 15 Minutes of Fame. Literally.

UPDATE: Alllllllrighty then. Here it is. I warned you about the (ahem) lighting.

I think that in the last few minutes of the interview, I come off sounding really harsh - like I am advocating locking up all homeless people. Which is really not what I was talking about. I was talking about people who bug the hell out of everyone on the street, which is not the same thing. I am was hopeful that the Community Court system proposed by Mistermayor's people will help to make sure people don't just ignore the citations given them by police for "quality of life" crimes. [Update: See Comments Section #10] Obviously we also need to have resources to help these folks deal with issues like drug problems, mental illnesses and homelessness.

PS - The Allman Brothers are from Macon, Georgia.

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A few weeks ago, I got an email from Art Bruzzone, the host of SF Unscripted asking me to be a guest on his tv show. I was all, "Hell to the yeah!" (playing hard to get not being my strong suit). I couldn't say "no". I am an American and therefore completely willing to make an ass of myself to be on the colorful box that keeps me company.

Before the taping, I talked with Art and he assured me that he would keep it "light and conversational, like the blog." I thought, "Its only 15 minutes of chatting. If I can't do that, I have no right calling myself a Southern woman." The show has two guests per episode, each of us gets interviewed for 15 minutes. The other person in my episode is Alisa Farenzena from the Berkeley College Republicans. No, I didn't meet her. Yes, she has crazy hair.

There was only one "take" for the whole interview (no stopping) so I was pretty much at Art's mercy for the entire time. Things were going relatively well until, about halfway through the interview he starts asking me about what won't I tolerate in this ever-tolerant city. Oh dear. What the hell happened to "light and conversational??"

The show just aired for the first time and anyone who thinks I came off as harsh in my response to that line of questioning can take solace in the fact that I look like hell in the interview. Seriously. I blame the lighting. And Rio. And anything else I can think of.

Eventually, the interview will be on the SF Unscripted website, but until then, you can see it on Comcast SF Cable Channel 11 on Thursday, October 18 at 6:30 p.m., Friday, October 19 at 8:00 p.m., and Sunday, October 21 at 8:00 p.m.

--Melissa

**Many thanks to Art for letting me be on his show!

Lower-Medium Time: Interview with "Chicken" John Rinaldi

El Greco and I decided to do joint video blog post over coffee; picking the person to interview was done over beers in the outdoor section of Harrington's bar.  One of us (can't remember who) said, "Let's talk to a mayoral candidate." So we began going down the list:

Grasshopper Kaplan:  Bad Crazy

Quintin Mecke: ZZZZZZZZZZZ

George Davis (the naked guy): Oh, sweet tiny little baby Jesus, NO!

"Chicken" John Rinaldi: Perfect!

A few days later, el Greco had contacted Chicken John and we were meeting at Grant's Tobacconists on a Saturday at 10 a.m..  Here is the video:

SIDENOTE: El Greco insists on calling me the "producer" of the interview. Actually, I'm more like the scrawny rich kid you invite to play solely because he has a cool football.  So, if "producer" means "girl with a camera, too much free time, and a basic understanding of iMovie," then yes, I am the producer. Bring me a bendy straw.

On my way to the smoke shop, I stopped for breakfast at 7-11 where I grabbed pizza-flavored Combos and Diet Mountain Dew.  When Chicken John arrived, clad in a fabulous red seersucker jacket and his trademark hat, he immediately began lecturing me about my eating habits.  After reading the nutritional information on the Combos bag, he actually said, "I think this may be the worst thing I have ever seen." Yes, but my Mountain Dew was diet, I helpfully reminded him.

As we prepared to film in the less-than-hospitable lighting at Grant's, I asked Chicken John to take off his hat.  He refused, saying it was his "thing." Since I know better than to come between a man and his "thing," I let it go and started the camera rolling.  All told, we filmed over 35 minutes of footage.  Some things that ended up on the cutting room floor are: the origin of the name "Chicken" John (he ran away from a fight when he was little), Quintin Mecke (nice guy, but a "wuss"), and Ed Jew (innocent until proven guilty). 

And, yes, that is me laughing in the background like an annoying Robin Quivers.  In my defense, I may have still been a little drunk from the night before.

When the interview was over and we were saying our goodbyes, Chicken John looked at me with genuine concern and said, "Seriously, you should get yourself a sandwich or something."

Which got me thinking: Chicken John may be a bit kooky, but would Mistermayor actually care about the fat content of my breakfast?

I think not.

--Melissa

Hedaho: Larry Craig's Constituents are Screwed

Constant Readers,

As if the people of Idaho didn't have enough to worry about when they found out one of their senators is toe-tapping-homo-hypocrite who likes skeevy airport bathroom sex, recently Idaho Senator Larry Craig tried to save his seat in the Senate by filing a motion to withdraw his guilty plea. Unfortunately for the people of Idaho, such motions are only granted to the biggest of imbeciles - so that's what Craig had to argue he is. Its sad to watch a grown man so desperate to stay in office that he'll gladly and publicly declare himself to be a Senatard. In this video blog, I go into detail about the arguments in the Senator's motion and why this is a whole new reason for folks to call for his resignation.

Links from info in the video:
1. Motion to Withdraw Plea
2. Minnesota Disorderly Conduct Statute
3. Story about the guy getting peeped at in the airport bathroom (page 6)
4. Report of 39 other persons arrested in Operation: Let's Go Outside
5. Transcript of arrest interview
6. Audio of arrest interview
7. Police Arrest Report

Thanks so much for watching/reading, y'all! Stay tuned for the results of his hearing this Wednesday.

UPDATE: The hearing took place on September 26, and the Judge says it will likely be the week of October 1 before any decision is rendered. In the meantime, here's the hearing transcript and the Prosecution's response to Craig's motion to withdraw the guilty plea.

SECOND UPDATE: In a well-reasoned decision, Judge Porter shot down Craig's lame-ass appeal on Thursday, October 4.  Craig had initially promised to resign if the appeal was denied.  But when the appeal actually was denied, Craig was all: "Sike! I am staying in office, suckers!" Republicans in Congress are all: "Dude. WTF? You said you'd go home!" The rest of us are all: "Great, 18 more months of Fairy Craig and Idahomo jokes." (Collective eyeroll.) **Special thanks to Robert Solis for the breaking news update!**

-Melissa

A Big Cup of STFU for Whoopi Goldberg

Constant Readers, I am sorry to be gone for so long! I have been busy with many other projects (including Napping, Watching "Ice Road Truckers", and Avoiding the Gym) for the month of August.  I am working on a long video piece on a local issue, but was jolted out of bed last night when I saw a report on Whoopi Goldberg's comments about Michael Vick on "The View".  Basically, she said that people from the Deep South don't know better than to fight and kill animals, so Vick didn't understand until recently that what he was doing was wrong.

Now, as a Georgia native and an animal lover, I was so incensed that I jumped up and filmed this video blog entry.  Poor Whoopi! Clearly, like Cindy Sheehan, she does not have a Good Girlfriend around to keep her from making an ass of herself.  Melissa to the rescue!

Links to information relied upon in making the video:

1. The full conversation by the overpaid twaddle-peddlers on The View.

2. Caryn Elaine Johnson (aka Whoopi Goldberg) was born in New York City.

3. The Deep South does not include Virginia or North Carolina (and often not South Carolina). Dumbass.

4. Michael Vick was born and raised in Newport News, Virginia.

5. Federal factual allegations against Vick can be found here.

6. Folks from Newport News, VA say there was no dogfighting 'round those parts.

7. Dogfighting unfortunately occurs in places throughout the nation. Los Angeles, Chicago, Ohio, Illinois, Virgina and yes, Mississippi. Basically wherever there are gangs.

No need to thank me, Ms. Goldberg. Just doin' my job, ma'am. Now that you have had this glass of STFU, I hope you can do yours.

-Melissa